Weiss Wants To Be A Millionaire!
by Quaterine Winner
Summary: Brad is the host of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire... and Omi is the player!


..Weiss Kreuz ~ Weiss Wants To Be A Millionaire!!!!!!!!  
  
Disclaimer: You gotta be tough if ya wanna be stupid! And stupid is what you are if you believe the boys are mine!  
  
*Flash on Screen with voice-over: WEISS WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE!!! WITH YOUR HOST, BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD CRAAAAAAWFORRD!!!*  
  
Crawford: Thank you, thank you. Tonight, we present a new version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?  
  
(Camera pans to the podium across from Crawford to show Omi Tsukiyono)  
  
Crawford: Our guest tonight is Tsukiyono Omi, who enjoys computers, darts and.making out with Nagi?  
  
Omi: *bright red blush*  
  
Crawford: Uh. anyway! *perfect host's smile* Since this is our show now.  
  
*Regis Philbin is heard screaming in the background*  
  
Crawford: We've changed the rules a bit. There is now an extra lifeline, Ask A Friend In The Audience!  
  
Omi: Let's begin, Crawford-san.  
  
Crawford: As you wish.  
  
*The questions go on and on, with Omi answering every one perfectly*  
  
Crawford: We're at the $21,000 level. Your question is:  
  
Is cheese a food?  
  
A. Yes  
  
B. No  
  
C. Maybe  
  
D. I don't know that, what is cheese?  
  
Omi: Um. I don't know. What is cheese?  
  
Crawford: Would you like to use a lifeline, Omi-san?  
  
Omi: Uh, hai. I'd like to use the Friend In The Audience.  
  
*Crawford and Omi turn to the audience, where a spotlight shines on Aya*  
  
Aya: Shi-ne!  
  
Crawford: All right! *big fake smile* You heard the question, I'm assuming?  
  
Aya: *grunts*  
  
Omi: Ayaaaaaaaaaaaa. *whines*  
  
Aya: Ah. A.  
  
Omi: I agree  
  
Crawford: You are correct!  
  
*Hoots and jeers are heard from the audience*  
  
Aya: *death glare * Shiiiiiii-neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.  
  
*Crickets chirp*  
  
Crawford: And to our next question:  
  
What is Weird Al Yankovic's last album?  
  
A. Eat It  
  
B. Running With Scissors  
  
C. Smells Like Nirvana  
  
D. I don't know, nor do I care.  
  
Omi: ... *sweatdrop*  
  
Crawford: *sweatdrop* Who comes up with these questions anyway?  
  
Omi: I would like to phone a friend please.  
  
Crawford: And we have your phone a friend, Nagi, on the line.  
  
Nagi: Okay, I'll press the right button with my telekinesis.  
  
*beep as the B button is pressed*  
  
Omi: Kisses, kitten!  
  
Nagi: Ja!  
  
*click*  
  
Crawford: What a kid.  
  
*The questions continue*  
  
Crawford: And we've reached our $1,000,000 level. You may want to use a lifeline for this one.  
  
A compact disc is also called:  
  
A. AA  
  
B. CD  
  
C. LSMFT  
  
D. DDDD  
  
Omi: Uh. B?  
  
Crawford: *seemingly unhearing* And the ask the audience poll is:  
  
A: 2%  
  
B: 89%  
  
C: 1%  
  
D. 0%  
  
Screw you, Crawford: 8%  
  
Crawford: Well, looks like the audience says B is the answer  
  
Omi: I agree  
  
Crawford: You are correct!  
  
Regis Philbin in BG: You're supposed to say, "Is that your final answer?" Moron! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!  
  
Crawford: That's enough Farf. Don't kill him.  
  
Farfarello in BG: Hurting Philbin hurts God!  
  
Crawford: And we've reached the $2,000,000 question:  
  
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?:  
  
A. Neither, seeing as I am God, I created all  
  
B. The what or the what?  
  
C. I'm a vegetarian, so I don't deal in these matters  
  
D. Neither, they depend on each other.  
  
Omi: ..... *sweatdrop*  
  
Crawford: Where the hell did that come from?  
  
Omi: Uh.lifeline please.  
  
Crawford: All right. 50/50 it is.  
  
*Letters A and C disappear*  
  
Omi: ... uh..  
  
Crawford: Eh, not much help, huh? Okay, we'll allow you one more Phone A Friend.  
  
Omi: Okay, I choose to phone. the producer of the show!!  
  
*Spotlight hits Crawford*  
  
Crawford: uh. who would that be? Oh yes, it's Regis!  
  
*Camera moves into the back room where Farfarello is torturing Regis*  
  
Crawford: Okay, Regis. Give Omi the answer and we'll let you go.  
  
Regis: *bleeding profusely* Okay! Okay! The answer is D!!!  
  
Crawford and Omi: Thank you, Regis.  
  
Crawford: Farfie, you may continue..  
  
Regis: But you said.!  
  
Crawford: *shrugs his elegant shoulders* Well, I lied.  
  
Omi: All right! The answer is D!  
  
*Dollar bills rain down as Aya rushes down from the audience*  
  
Omi: I won! Yahoooo!  
  
Crawford: Tune in next time for Schwarz Wants to Be A Millionaire! With your host, Kudou Yohji!  
  
~The End~  
  
Notes: You like? I like! Tell me if you liked it and maybe we do more! Heh heh. Until next time, loyal readers.  
  
I remain,  
  
Q. 


End file.
